Wednesday, August 4, 2010

The future scares me

I can't sleep. The future scares me- I'm trying to focus on the now only. We all get old- and during this process we all hope to accomplish a lot in life and succeed in living. I'm content with what I have now. Idk what it is, maybe it is the events that have occurred/are occurring that's making me think, maybe it's because I have some free time now, what ever it is, I can't sleep and am scared of the future. I've made many friends and lost many friends in the past 3 years- and I find myself wishing I could go back and understand where things went wrong. I've come to a conclusion that everyone who has ever inspired me, like an older sibling to me, and/or someone I looked up to - has all have failed me. All but three, my mom, my dad, and my love. I've learned to trust in them and rely on them to not be scared of the future. They have seen me grow and love me at my worst and I am thankful. Only those three can stand my stubbornness and demanding ways- they take me as I am and I love them. Enough emo time, lol, need to sleep zzzzzzzzzz.